So here I am, at a coffee shop in a college town. Most of the college kids are still drunk from last night's debauchery. I woke up to a craving for pastries and coffee with milk. And a coffee shop with free WiFi. So here I am. Avoiding the fact that I have to go into work on a Sunday. A Sunday. So I guess this is growing up.
The new Arcade Fire album, "Neon Bible," is good. Arcade Fire made an album where they sound like Arcade Fire. What's that you say? They made an album where they sound like themselves? Astonishing!
I've been thrown out of orbit lately- death in the family, physical sickness, depression. Not in that order, but moreso, concurrently happening in layers, depression on top of death on top of sickness.
More and more each I've been wishing for spring/summer/warmth. I walked outside yesterday and the texture of the snow looked different- not so smooth, but as though I could see each individual snowflake that made the piles of snow outside and I thought to myself, "Maybe this means it is melting away for spring time..." Snapped back into reality, its January, Jennifer. Spring is still months away. Open toed shoes and windows rolled down/music turned up is still months away.
I am headed to Houston this week for a work conference. It would seem I'm the only one among my coworkers who is a) excited to go and b) excited to learn what's new in my field. Its weird and full of pressure to be the It Girl of the Moment at your company- among your coworkers and customers. So many of the people I talk to weekly becoming real faces. So many mouths saying, "I can't wait to meet you!" and "You've done amazing things." I feel excitement, but I also feel keenly aware of the enormous pressure mounting.
And then to my granny's house in Florida- post work conference. I need some centering right now. My Granny and I are one in the same, so the long weekend will be spent at flea markets and cocktail hours and riding bicycles. Hopefully the Florida sunshine can hold me over until spring arrives...or at least until the snow melts.
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