Hello from Illinois!
Due to concentrated amounts of caffeine, moonbeams, and serious lifestyle commitments, I am all about all-night rendezvous(es) lately. There is so much to fit into a single day; I am inhaling every moment. Its like that Aerosmith song or something.
So I am home in Illinois and it is effing cold out. Being here has turned me inward, introspectively speaking. I am focusing and re-focusing my gaze, looking for clarity. Trying to understand which battles to fight. Which battles are worth fighting. No clear answers yet. I should tell you, I should tell you...
Pieces of this life have come full circle. Other parts have grown ever so distant. Is it possible for these two to occur simultaneously?
Truthfully: I don't feel I can be as honest in this space as I want to be (in this little corner of my internet). That is the most truthful statement in this post.
Reflective of 2oo7: quiet New Years (barely a whisper), Colorado, sold my car, NYC, work from home, TexasFloridaIllinoisMinnesotaWisconsinPennsylvaniaNewJerseyDelawareMarylandDCConnecticutMassachusettsKansasOhioWashingtonNorthCarolinaSouthCarolinaFrance!, too much, not enough. Nothing new, everything different.
2oo8: Do not move across the country. Wear earplugs. Japan. Eradicating complacency. Vomit on each form of mass transit in the MTA system. Don't get knocked up. Write you a letter that tells the truth. Maintain Zen-like state. More, more, more.
Showing posts with label drinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label drinking. Show all posts
Monday, December 24, 2007
Thursday, September 13, 2007
The abbreviated version.
Life has jumped back into full swing mode lately, but in the best way imagineable.
Abridged:
& Moving! I found a sweet little apartment three blocks north of our current abode. The new place is so great and is owned by this nice lady who speaks Spanish, but will let us paint however we'd like. It also has ceiling fans and a separate office for me, which is better than anything I could have dreamed of when I started this battle. Have you ever been apartment hunting in New York? Its miserable and everything about getting this apartment was incredibly atypical of that process.
I have thoughtfully decided on the colors for my bedroom and the kitchen, but still undecided as to whether to paint the living room right now. My soon to be bedroom is a poop brown color right now, so I'm glad that's going.
& I am currently fighting off feelings of wanting to dress in layers and autumn kissed sweaters. I know everyone says it, but I really love dressing for fall. Truth be told, I love summer and fall and dressing for them.
& I'm going to Ohio in October. That's all.
& I tried acupuncture for the first time last week. It felt prickly and relaxing and tingley.
& I saw Walmart: A Rock Opera* last week. I appreciated (and agreed with) the sentiment and message, but ultimately I think those things may have been lost in a format (musical theater) that traditionally doesn't foster for "the big picture message". Walmart is bad. Walmartopia is silly.
& I saw Rent starring Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascal a while back. They've reprised their roles, and yeah, they are too old to play Mark and Roger, but it was fun and I loved it all the same.
& I have been drinking too much Belgian beer recently.
& I swallowed the septum retainer I have kept hidden for the better part of the last 3-4 years and as a result, have been wearing a septum ring that shows. All my new friends say, "Woah! You got a new piercing!" to which I say, "No....I swallowed the old one. This is almost six years old." Six years with this honkin piece of metal shoved up my nose. I won't stop wearing it or let it close up because it holds special meaning for me. Perhaps someday I'll go into the details of why I chose to modify myself in this way, but six years later and I still haven't shared that story with anyone for quiet, personal reasons. Additionally now, I'm trying to redefine the septum ring from being a confrontational statement to being something even adorable girls can wear. Scarlett Johanssen has a septum ring too, and while she's a picture of pretty, I think its bold that she has a septum ring too.
& Is anyone on Goodreads? Find me! Let's be bookworms together!
*Not actual title of play.
Abridged:
& Moving! I found a sweet little apartment three blocks north of our current abode. The new place is so great and is owned by this nice lady who speaks Spanish, but will let us paint however we'd like. It also has ceiling fans and a separate office for me, which is better than anything I could have dreamed of when I started this battle. Have you ever been apartment hunting in New York? Its miserable and everything about getting this apartment was incredibly atypical of that process.
I have thoughtfully decided on the colors for my bedroom and the kitchen, but still undecided as to whether to paint the living room right now. My soon to be bedroom is a poop brown color right now, so I'm glad that's going.
& I am currently fighting off feelings of wanting to dress in layers and autumn kissed sweaters. I know everyone says it, but I really love dressing for fall. Truth be told, I love summer and fall and dressing for them.
& I'm going to Ohio in October. That's all.
& I tried acupuncture for the first time last week. It felt prickly and relaxing and tingley.
& I saw Walmart: A Rock Opera* last week. I appreciated (and agreed with) the sentiment and message, but ultimately I think those things may have been lost in a format (musical theater) that traditionally doesn't foster for "the big picture message". Walmart is bad. Walmartopia is silly.
& I saw Rent starring Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascal a while back. They've reprised their roles, and yeah, they are too old to play Mark and Roger, but it was fun and I loved it all the same.
& I have been drinking too much Belgian beer recently.
& I swallowed the septum retainer I have kept hidden for the better part of the last 3-4 years and as a result, have been wearing a septum ring that shows. All my new friends say, "Woah! You got a new piercing!" to which I say, "No....I swallowed the old one. This is almost six years old." Six years with this honkin piece of metal shoved up my nose. I won't stop wearing it or let it close up because it holds special meaning for me. Perhaps someday I'll go into the details of why I chose to modify myself in this way, but six years later and I still haven't shared that story with anyone for quiet, personal reasons. Additionally now, I'm trying to redefine the septum ring from being a confrontational statement to being something even adorable girls can wear. Scarlett Johanssen has a septum ring too, and while she's a picture of pretty, I think its bold that she has a septum ring too.
& Is anyone on Goodreads? Find me! Let's be bookworms together!
*Not actual title of play.
Monday, August 20, 2007
Crisitunity.
Episode: "Fear Of Flying" (12/18/94)
Context: Homer's response when Lisa informs him that the Chinese use "the same word for 'crisis' as they do for 'opportunity.'"
Real-life uses: As an irrationally exuberant response to any impending crummy situation.
And now....a story for you:
On Friday, I was on my way out the door to meet Adam at the movies. We were going to see the Simpsons, appropriately enough, which was hilarious and I would give it eight thumbs up. Alternately, on a scale of dinosaurs, I would rate it a pterodactyl. Before leaving my house, I poured myself and Adam each our own travel mug of Bison Grass vodka with apple juice and a sprinkle of cinnamon.
Now you might be saying to yourself, "Jen, isn't that what alcoholics do- carry their drinks around with them? I've seen this on Lifetime movies and very special episodes of sitcoms before." And to you I say, "Yes, some alcoholics do carry their flasks of alcohol with them. Some people who just like to drink do that." Especially ones who don't drive. And c'mon, they don't sell beer at the movies. And if they did, it would be a beer-like liquid and overpriced.
It was raining Friday, so I had an umbrella in addition to my two travel mugs: my new 75th Anniversary Jacob's Pillow mug and the mug I purchased during the "rest stop" portion of my amazing bus trip to DC a few weeks ago.
Its like this, except mine is plastic and has a lid for traveling (in)conveinence.
I'm holding the umbrella over my head with one hand and have a travel mug in my other hand. But where to put the second travel mug? Well, like all of the ladies here in New York and Hollywood starlets, I have a bag that could fit a unicorn or a dwarf-sized hobo inside. I have a lot of important junk I have to carry around with me: Blackberry, three kinds of lip goo (including the aforementioned American Girl Mango Tango), two pens, one Sharpie (for drunken fun), cigarette case (incidentally which, does not hold cigarettes but my id, Metrocard, and college id in cases of "with valid student ID"), the latest book I'm reading (Them by Francine du Plessix Gray), digital camera, iPod, a recent crumpled fortune I got from Chinese takeout (You will inherit a gold mine in Africa. [What?]), and hand sanitizer, of course. I needed an extra place to put this mug and I take assesment of my bag and think, "I can wedge this mug in the end if I arrange everything right. The lid is secure." And so I follow this plan of action.
And let me tell you: I made it approximately 4 steps before spilling half that mug of vodka all over myself and the entire contents of my bag, including my Blackberry.
Beloved Blackberry, giver of emails, schedules, and internet access, flickered and faded into its death about 10 hours later.
RIP, Blackberry 8700. November 2006 - August 2007.
To confirm that Blackberry was really dead, I went to the AT&T, formerly Cingular store, in Union Square. The helpful man looked at it and said, "Did it get wet?" To which I responded, "Well, I mean, it was raining last night. Actually, it drowned in vodka. [sad, shameful face]" He confirmed there was little hope for rescue, so it was then that I had to consider my options and quickly realized, BUY A NEW PHONE, because I'm not Hermione Granger and I can't conjure cell phones. Furthermore, if I WAS Hermione Granger, I wouldn't need a cell phone, I could just send my Patronus all over the land to send my messages.
Miss Granger, if you're nasty.
Truthfully, I really loved the idea of the Blackberry, but it felt too adult- too business suit- too much guy with shooter fingers.
Put a shirt on!
I took this CRISITUNITY! and realized that if I had to buy a new cell phone, I should go with something that was ME. I wanted less Blackberry, more phone. I wanted less business suit, more I'm creative person. But what phone could possibly fulfill all of my hopes, dreams, and desires without leaving me feeling dirty in the morning?
That's how I ended up with an iPhone. And also how I became Tom Cruise in Minority Report.
Its definitely the touch screen. Or the fact that I call it "my iPod Phone" like my granny would. Or its tiny size. Or its ability to summon unicorns. Or how it says, "I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do," like HAL 9000. Actually, that last part is a little weird, but hey! Its the future and we're all going to start using hoverboards and drive flying cars soon!
Except me. I don't drive. But I'll get my iPhone to drive for me.
Context: Homer's response when Lisa informs him that the Chinese use "the same word for 'crisis' as they do for 'opportunity.'"
Real-life uses: As an irrationally exuberant response to any impending crummy situation.
And now....a story for you:
On Friday, I was on my way out the door to meet Adam at the movies. We were going to see the Simpsons, appropriately enough, which was hilarious and I would give it eight thumbs up. Alternately, on a scale of dinosaurs, I would rate it a pterodactyl. Before leaving my house, I poured myself and Adam each our own travel mug of Bison Grass vodka with apple juice and a sprinkle of cinnamon.
Now you might be saying to yourself, "Jen, isn't that what alcoholics do- carry their drinks around with them? I've seen this on Lifetime movies and very special episodes of sitcoms before." And to you I say, "Yes, some alcoholics do carry their flasks of alcohol with them. Some people who just like to drink do that." Especially ones who don't drive. And c'mon, they don't sell beer at the movies. And if they did, it would be a beer-like liquid and overpriced.
It was raining Friday, so I had an umbrella in addition to my two travel mugs: my new 75th Anniversary Jacob's Pillow mug and the mug I purchased during the "rest stop" portion of my amazing bus trip to DC a few weeks ago.
Its like this, except mine is plastic and has a lid for traveling (in)conveinence.
I'm holding the umbrella over my head with one hand and have a travel mug in my other hand. But where to put the second travel mug? Well, like all of the ladies here in New York and Hollywood starlets, I have a bag that could fit a unicorn or a dwarf-sized hobo inside. I have a lot of important junk I have to carry around with me: Blackberry, three kinds of lip goo (including the aforementioned American Girl Mango Tango), two pens, one Sharpie (for drunken fun), cigarette case (incidentally which, does not hold cigarettes but my id, Metrocard, and college id in cases of "with valid student ID"), the latest book I'm reading (Them by Francine du Plessix Gray), digital camera, iPod, a recent crumpled fortune I got from Chinese takeout (You will inherit a gold mine in Africa. [What?]), and hand sanitizer, of course. I needed an extra place to put this mug and I take assesment of my bag and think, "I can wedge this mug in the end if I arrange everything right. The lid is secure." And so I follow this plan of action.
And let me tell you: I made it approximately 4 steps before spilling half that mug of vodka all over myself and the entire contents of my bag, including my Blackberry.
Beloved Blackberry, giver of emails, schedules, and internet access, flickered and faded into its death about 10 hours later.
RIP, Blackberry 8700. November 2006 - August 2007.
To confirm that Blackberry was really dead, I went to the AT&T, formerly Cingular store, in Union Square. The helpful man looked at it and said, "Did it get wet?" To which I responded, "Well, I mean, it was raining last night. Actually, it drowned in vodka. [sad, shameful face]" He confirmed there was little hope for rescue, so it was then that I had to consider my options and quickly realized, BUY A NEW PHONE, because I'm not Hermione Granger and I can't conjure cell phones. Furthermore, if I WAS Hermione Granger, I wouldn't need a cell phone, I could just send my Patronus all over the land to send my messages.
Miss Granger, if you're nasty.
Truthfully, I really loved the idea of the Blackberry, but it felt too adult- too business suit- too much guy with shooter fingers.
Put a shirt on!
I took this CRISITUNITY! and realized that if I had to buy a new cell phone, I should go with something that was ME. I wanted less Blackberry, more phone. I wanted less business suit, more I'm creative person. But what phone could possibly fulfill all of my hopes, dreams, and desires without leaving me feeling dirty in the morning?
That's how I ended up with an iPhone. And also how I became Tom Cruise in Minority Report.
Its definitely the touch screen. Or the fact that I call it "my iPod Phone" like my granny would. Or its tiny size. Or its ability to summon unicorns. Or how it says, "I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do," like HAL 9000. Actually, that last part is a little weird, but hey! Its the future and we're all going to start using hoverboards and drive flying cars soon!
Except me. I don't drive. But I'll get my iPhone to drive for me.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Real beauty is watching out for friends.
Ahhhhhhh, don't you love fortune cookie wisdom? Except, the title of this post came from the lid of my Mango Tango American Girl $1 lip gloss. Its good enough to eat. Actually, that's all I'm eating these days- I'm on the American Girl Lip Gloss diet.
That's my $1 lip gloss gangsta face.
Presently, the episode of the Simpsons that starts with Tax Day, is on the television. It feels as though I've seen this episode a thousand times more than all the other episodes of the Simpsons. That's really all I have to say about that.
This week, I've been struggling to jump back into regular work-at-home schedule after my two week road trip. Let me also take this opportunity to say Thank you: KateHankMrHickmantheBusDriverMichelleTrevorErinWayneMomDadBethJaneGrannyLindaBillMattBrendaJenMarkScooterBradJAdbouAdrienneJamie and everyone else I encountered along the way. You guys collectively rock my world.
My friend Mark recently interviewed Marketa, the pretty lady from the movie, Once. When I saw this movie it blew me away, so I was amazed to hear that Marketa and Glen Hassard (of The Frames) are/were touring the US recently. Anyways, you can read Mark's interview with Marketa on his blog here.
That's my $1 lip gloss gangsta face.
Presently, the episode of the Simpsons that starts with Tax Day, is on the television. It feels as though I've seen this episode a thousand times more than all the other episodes of the Simpsons. That's really all I have to say about that.
This week, I've been struggling to jump back into regular work-at-home schedule after my two week road trip. Let me also take this opportunity to say Thank you: KateHankMrHickmantheBusDriverMichelleTrevorErinWayneMomDadBethJaneGrannyLindaBillMattBrendaJenMarkScooterBradJAdbouAdrienneJamie and everyone else I encountered along the way. You guys collectively rock my world.
My friend Mark recently interviewed Marketa, the pretty lady from the movie, Once. When I saw this movie it blew me away, so I was amazed to hear that Marketa and Glen Hassard (of The Frames) are/were touring the US recently. Anyways, you can read Mark's interview with Marketa on his blog here.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Enter exhaustion.
After deciding that it would be amazing to put on the special skills section of my resume "Non-sloppy, efficient vomiting drunk" I puked the most amazing raspberry sorbet colored vomit onto the ground of my subway platform as I stumbled home greeting the sunrise at 5.30 this morning.
I spent yesterday afternoon at the Renegrade Craft Fair at the McCarren Pool. It was not my midwestern mum's potpourri and teddy bear craft fair, that's certain. I walked away with a beautiful hand sewn leather business card organizer and a lamp made from drink umbrellas! All the craftiness at the fair yesterday inspired me to finally decorate and organize my room today. Its been a battle, but I am slowly creating the atmosphere I want my bedroom and office to have. My room is beginning to glow with green and blues and oranges (the basic color scheme). That means I shan't be embarrassed when you come to visit and my walls are bare!
See how I threw in that part about you visiting? Clever. But seriously. Come visit!
I spent yesterday afternoon at the Renegrade Craft Fair at the McCarren Pool. It was not my midwestern mum's potpourri and teddy bear craft fair, that's certain. I walked away with a beautiful hand sewn leather business card organizer and a lamp made from drink umbrellas! All the craftiness at the fair yesterday inspired me to finally decorate and organize my room today. Its been a battle, but I am slowly creating the atmosphere I want my bedroom and office to have. My room is beginning to glow with green and blues and oranges (the basic color scheme). That means I shan't be embarrassed when you come to visit and my walls are bare!
See how I threw in that part about you visiting? Clever. But seriously. Come visit!
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
C'mon, Feel the Illinoise!
Hey friendlies. I'm here in Illinois. I've been running on "if I stop moving I'll die" mode since moving to New York and being in Illinois hasn't slowed that down ONE TINY BIT. But I love it. I feel good all over- orrrrr that's the 8.5% beers talking.
I can't offer much more than that in words at the moment. But here is a picture of my cat and I gloriously reunited and LOVING IT:
This is exactly how my work days go. LOVE.
I can't offer much more than that in words at the moment. But here is a picture of my cat and I gloriously reunited and LOVING IT:
This is exactly how my work days go. LOVE.
Sunday, February 25, 2007
I am not watching awards shows tonight, and I am okay with that.
Since November, I've been getting paid to travel and write a book. The two aren't really connected, that is to say, I am not writing about traveling. I am writing and I am traveling. Mostly writing. So I sit at my computer and tippity-tap away, music in ears. Since November. That's what (counts on fingers, NovemberDecemberJanuaryFebruary) four months? That's nearly half of a human baby's gestation. And I absolutely cannot wait for the day, the very magical day when this book that I am writing will be complete.
Because as it stands, its depressing the hell out of me. Its sucking out my life force. I come home from work at night and my glazed over eyes don't want to think about anything. I don't want to be creative or produce anything of substance. Watch movie, zone out, fall asleep.
I'm a zombie. Minus the undead issue.
And yet, in two weeks, when I've birthed this book and its done and finished I can't help but think I'll be just a little sad. Spending four months struggling and loving and coddling this book and after the party we're having to celebrate its completion and my transition into foremost authority, I think I'll feel a bit relieved AND melancholy. Its my book, my project, my four and a half months of workingdreamingeatingbreathing about this book.
But those are feelings that are still two weeks away. For now I am feeling excited and tired and nervous and anxious and bewildered- there are some fairly major happenings besides this one project in my life. Big things I am too nervous to talk about right now. Major life transitions that cause me to talk to myself in my car and in the bathroom mirror as I attempt not to smudge the eyeliner under my eyes.
I'm a creature who craves positive reinforcement. So every step of the way lately has been about rewards: yes, you can have a Cadbury egg, yes, you can have a glass of wine, yes, you should wear a super cute outfit today. I'm also making a concious effort to spend less on the unnecessary things in my life so that I can enjoy the fun things- CDs, concerts, summer vacations to far (and near) lands. I look forward to start sewing again soon. I love sewing far more than knitting because I am a creature who relies on instant gratification. I've picked out the patterns (big and small) and the fabrics and I am so so excited. I'll keep you updated on my progress with those things.
My frigid fingers are struggling to keep up with my writing stride this evening. When my head craves writing, I follow because its a crap shoot when it may happen again. Even at 150 wpm, my fingers cannot keep up. My head is full of thoughts, my lungs are short on breath, my ears and my heart are full of beats. I slept with a wide open window last night and it felt refreshing to wake up to sunshine and birds chirping.
My music playlist lately:
The Get Up Kids - Something to Write Home About
The Fratellis - Costello Music
The Teddybears
Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion Soundtrack
R.E.M - Greatest Hits
LILY ALLEN, obvs.
iPod shuffle because it hurts to think.
Things I dig about college towns:
JIMMY JOHN'S.
Sidenote
This is a big week for me and the direction of my life, you guys, and although I can't talk about it right now, will you please think of me? Will you please keep me in your thoughts? Will you just remember that I could use some positive thinking right now? I cannot tell you how much it means to me and how much I am trying to send my positive thoughts to all of you too...
Because as it stands, its depressing the hell out of me. Its sucking out my life force. I come home from work at night and my glazed over eyes don't want to think about anything. I don't want to be creative or produce anything of substance. Watch movie, zone out, fall asleep.
I'm a zombie. Minus the undead issue.
And yet, in two weeks, when I've birthed this book and its done and finished I can't help but think I'll be just a little sad. Spending four months struggling and loving and coddling this book and after the party we're having to celebrate its completion and my transition into foremost authority, I think I'll feel a bit relieved AND melancholy. Its my book, my project, my four and a half months of workingdreamingeatingbreathing about this book.
But those are feelings that are still two weeks away. For now I am feeling excited and tired and nervous and anxious and bewildered- there are some fairly major happenings besides this one project in my life. Big things I am too nervous to talk about right now. Major life transitions that cause me to talk to myself in my car and in the bathroom mirror as I attempt not to smudge the eyeliner under my eyes.
I'm a creature who craves positive reinforcement. So every step of the way lately has been about rewards: yes, you can have a Cadbury egg, yes, you can have a glass of wine, yes, you should wear a super cute outfit today. I'm also making a concious effort to spend less on the unnecessary things in my life so that I can enjoy the fun things- CDs, concerts, summer vacations to far (and near) lands. I look forward to start sewing again soon. I love sewing far more than knitting because I am a creature who relies on instant gratification. I've picked out the patterns (big and small) and the fabrics and I am so so excited. I'll keep you updated on my progress with those things.
My frigid fingers are struggling to keep up with my writing stride this evening. When my head craves writing, I follow because its a crap shoot when it may happen again. Even at 150 wpm, my fingers cannot keep up. My head is full of thoughts, my lungs are short on breath, my ears and my heart are full of beats. I slept with a wide open window last night and it felt refreshing to wake up to sunshine and birds chirping.
My music playlist lately:
The Get Up Kids - Something to Write Home About
The Fratellis - Costello Music
The Teddybears
Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion Soundtrack
R.E.M - Greatest Hits
LILY ALLEN, obvs.
iPod shuffle because it hurts to think.
Things I dig about college towns:
JIMMY JOHN'S.
Sidenote
This is a big week for me and the direction of my life, you guys, and although I can't talk about it right now, will you please think of me? Will you please keep me in your thoughts? Will you just remember that I could use some positive thinking right now? I cannot tell you how much it means to me and how much I am trying to send my positive thoughts to all of you too...
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